Skip to main content

Sucky, suck, suck

I'm not okay right now. I hate this grief roller coaster. Sometimes I think my heart is starting to mend. Then something triggers it to rip back open.

I think of all these topics of things that I want to write about and then I open up my computer to write and just stare at the screen because all that I want to write is that I am tired of faking the smile I put on my face everyday when I go out to meet the world and how all I want to do is lay in my bed and scream until my voice gets hoarse then cry until I fall asleep. But even in sleep, the nightmares come.

This is so hard. I'm back to work full time. I am grateful for the structure and I know that I need it but I don't have nearly as much laying in my bed and hiding from the world time as I want. And now that school has started there is always homework, studying, lunches to back, clothes to organize and can you believe these kids of mine expect dinner every night! I'm overwhelmed right now. I know that I am not the first widow in the world with kids. I have this amazing online support of other widows with children who get it but still, sometimes I just feel alone in this deep, ugly, pain.

My house is messy, my grass in never completely mowed, dinner is always half-assed, sometimes I give clothes a sniff test before I hand them over to the kids because clean clothes never make it to the dresser.

I miss Dennis. I miss having him encourage me when motherhood got too overwhelming. I miss him rubbing my feet after a long day at work. I miss cooking him dinner, he always ate his vegetables. I miss talking to him. I can't talk to him now. It's too hard. I miss his hugs. God, do I miss his hugs.

So this is hard. And I want to cry. And sometimes I do. But most of the time I just put that mask on and get out there and fake it. Fake it til you make it right?

Sorry if you are getting tired of my sadness and grief, I'm pretty tired of it too.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

It's a day I'm glad I survived-Part 1

May 20th 2006, I married my best friend. This year my best friend was dead on our anniversary. Dead. My person is gone. The hope for his earthly recovery is gone. My partner will never get to come home. We won't get any more chances. This year, on Saturday the 19th, Uncle Jon came and got the boys for a fun day. Thank God for Uncle Jon. He loves those boys with a big, fierce love and the feeling is mutual. The original plan was for a day for them at the river. The non-stop rain we have been having in VA made that impossible so they went to the Science Museum, out to lunch, to Game Stop, and back to the house to play. The boys are still talking about their day with him. He makes them laugh. It's the kind of laughter that fills all the empty parts of my heart, and there are so many empty parts now. Him coming down that day also gave me a day to take care of myself, which was a huge gift in itself. How lucky are we to have Uncle Jon. My friend Whitney ventured to Mechanicsvill...

Saturday morning couch surgery

Saturday morning I woke up to Briton standing very close to the side of my bed with a very worried expression on his face. "Mommy, I need your help." You could just hear the stress dripping out of his voice. "What's wrong Bubs?" I asked, suddenly awake. "I can't find my iPod and I've been looking for an hour!" he told me. Really kid? I haven't slept past 7am in I don't know how long and this is why you are waking me up? I thought about rolling over and going back to sleep until Scoty woke (me) up...but he looked really upset so this mom got her butt out of bed. Brit had fallen asleep on the couch watching YouTube videos on his iPod the night before. There is an opening in our couch that eats things. They fall through and land inside the couch where your hands can't reach. I know this because one night my phone fell into this couch black hole and I had to cut a small hole into the underlay fabric (I'm not sure if that i...